Know Your Xiaolin Stars
by Bravado
Summary: TIME TO CELEBRATE MY 20th CHAPTER! This time: Chase's Jungle Cat. Next Chapter: Dyris
1. Omi

Know your Xiaolin Stars

NOTE: I DON'T OWN XIAOLIN SHOWDOWN OR ALL THAT'S FAMOUS 'KNOW YOUR STARS' SHORT!

Read and enjoy, ya'll. I will try to make more chapters when I feel like I want to write.

The Italicized font is the evil voice.

Chapter One: Omi

Omi screams and stands on a stool while a squirrel chased him.

Omi: Go away, you big meanhead! Before I unleash the fearsome Tsunami Strike!

Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars… 

Omi: Chase, is that you? Come out and show yourself!

_Omi, he has a shrine of Kimiko in his closet._

Kimiko: You pervert piece of crap!

Kimiko shoots flames out of her hand. Omi screams and runs around in circles.

Omi: I don't, I tell you; the evil voice is lying to you! I spear!

Kimiko: Its 'I swear'.

Omi: How dare you!

_Omi, he is a robot commanded by George W. Bush._

Omi: OMG AM I? HELP! HELP!

Bush: I looked through my list and checked it twice, and I don't see an OMIBOT 2000 anywhere.

Secret Service Guy: I'm hungry for some cake!

Secret Service Guy 2: Me too! Come on, Mr. President, there's cake in the Oval Office!

Bush: Oh boy! Cake!

…_OK… Weird… Omi, he hates Nintendo._

Omi: What's that?

HoldYourFire: OH HECK NO! I'M GONNA BREAK YOUR SHIN, YOU NINTENDO-HATER!!!

Omi: Tell me, what is this 'Nintendo' that you speak of!

HoldYourFire: NINTENDO LOVERS, UNITE!

An angry mob with shirts that have Mario on holding pitchforks and torches chase Omi.

Omi: Help! Help!

Now you know Omi, the Nintendo hater that has a Kimiko shrine and is a robot owned by George Bush.

Read and Review! Next Chapter is Raimundo.


	2. Raimundo

CHAPTER 1 HAS MY DISCLAIMER, YA'LL

If anyone wants to give me ideas, you can post them on the reviews page!

Chapter 2: Raimundo

After many shin-breakings, Tsunami Strikes, torches, and pitchforks, Raimundo appears with a note in his hand.

Rai: Now, where is that hot woman someone promised? She wrote that she would be in this spooky stage.

Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars… 

Rai: AHH! Who's there? Come out and fight, fraidy cat!

_No thank you… Raimundo, he is in love with Clay._

Clay: Aww shucks. I never knew Rai.

Rai: I'm not in love with you, Stone Henge!

Clay: Humph!

_Raimundo, he wasn't a carnage, but a stripper._

Rai: NO I WASN'T YOU GAY SON OF A STUPID WATER GUN!

Kimiko: Then explain this black wife beater, stupid!

Rai: Um… yeah… er… that's not mine…

Kimiko: Yeah right!

Kimiko starts to get mad and chases Rai around. After a while she stops and leaves.

_Raimundo, he hates Star Wars._

Rai: I do to like Star Wars!

MicrowaveTurtle: Get him!

The mob that had the Mario shirts on changed to Yoda, and instead of pitchforks and torches, they had lightsabers and laser guns. They chase Raimundo around, shooting him with lasers and stabbing him with lightsabers.

_Now you know Raimundo, the stripper that loves Clay and hates Star Wars._

Like I said in the last chapter, read and review. Due to my last review, saying this was the so far funniest thing out in the Xiaolin Showdown criteria, I will try to keep it that way. The next chapter is Clay!


	3. Clay

Chapter 1 for disclaimer.

I have been praised about my good work on these two chapters, so here comes number 3!

Chapter 3 Clay

After Kimiko carts Raimundo's dead body off the stage, Clay appears.

Clay: All right, now, where is my all-you-can-eat buffet?

Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars… 

Clay: So, where is my buffet?

_There is none._

Clay: What! I'm madder than a rattlesnake in labor getting stepped on!

_What the…What? Whatever… Clay, he stole his hat from the CIA._

Clay: No I didn't! I got this from my daddy!

A bunch of CIA people ride in on little motorized scooters. They all taze Clay with those little tazer thingies. After a while, he gets up.

Clay: Ow… What the heck?

_Clay, he copies similes, metaphors, and personifications from Larry the Cable Guy._

Clay: What?!

Larry: I'm madder than a legless Ethiopian watching a donut roll down a hill!

Larry the Cable Guy gets his grandma to do a pile drive on Clay. Of course, they leave after a while.

Clay: Man, that woman's scarier than Harry Manlo wearing a dress carrying a box of rubbers!

Ha! Told you! Clay, all yours with just 3 easy payments of 40 dollars! 

A bunch of girls get on stage, holding their purses and having a fistful of dollars (not the movie)

Girls (in unison): I want Clay! No, I want him! He's mine! NO, HE'S MINE!

The girls grab a stunned Clay and run off, leaving a pile of money.

_Now you know Clay, the CIA's hat stealing, Larry the Cable Guy line copying guy that is all yours for just 3 easy payments of 40 dollars._

There you go! Chapter 3! Next up is Kimiko!


	4. Kimiko

Chapter 1 for disclaimer.

Wow! I've been getting a lot of reviews! I'll keep 'em comin'!

Chapter 4 Kimiko

As soon as MicrowaveTurtle stuffs the money into the bag and runs off, Kimiko appears. As usual, she dyed her hair to look like a monster… I mean a beautiful queen! Heh Heh.

Kimiko: All right, where is the free hair dye? I need some more!

Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars… 

Kimiko: WHERE IS MY FREE HAIR DYE!

Sorry, you're too late. I sold it all! 

Kimiko: No fair! You didn't even advertise an Early Bird special!

_Whatever, weirdo! Kimiko, she is in love with Clay Aiken. (_**Thanks, pinkypu19932006!**)

Kimiko: No, I don't, you creepy weirdo!

Clay Aiken (I hate him, but hey, he's famous, so…) appears wearing a wedding gown, microphone in one hand, a pixies' wand in the other.

Clay (off key): Here come's the bride, all dressed and wide, her name is Clyde, and she reads TV Guide!

He skips off to the exit, then trips over his gown, skips, trips, and continues in that pattern, singing his weird wedding march.

Kimiko: … FREAKY GAY GUY!

_I wish he would fall off the balcony… Kimiko, she draws pictures of people's tongues._

Kimiko is scribbling something on a notepad with a pencil. As she noticed that she is being watched, she rips up a lot of pictures and throws the pencil at the camera.

Kimiko: What? No… I would never… no!

Master Fung: Young One, why was this tapped to my door?

Kimiko: I don't know, Rai must have done it!

Kimiko, I am your father… 

Kimiko: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Now you know Kimiko, the tongue drawer that is in love with Clay Aiken and is my daughter.

Kimiko: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I know I did make this one a bit… weird… but at least I warned you on my summary! So there! Next up, of course, is Master Fung!


	5. Master Fung

Chapter 1 for disclaimer.

Wow, this is where the buck stops if I were writing another story! This is such an honor for me! Oh, what a moment! Here is Chapter 5!

Chapter 5: Master Fung

As the "happy people" took Kimiko to the "happy hotel" for the use of the "NOOO!" fit, Master Fung enters, carrying the Shen Gong Wu Scroll.

Master Fung: I can't seem to find the Egg of Crap! (He pronounces it 'crap-ey')

Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars… 

Master Fung: Oh my! Who's there? Wuya, is that you?

_I don't know, am I? Master Fung, he calls Dojo 'gecko' behind his back._

Dojo: Is that so? I'll kill you, old man!

Master Fung: The… who are you up there, male or female?

_Guy._

Master Fung: That man is lying to you.

Dojo, in his fit of rage, fights with Master Fung.

Master Fung: If you weren't such a weird growing snake-thingy, I'd like you even more!

_Ok, that's two of the five that had admitted something on this show. _

Dojo: If you weren't such a crack head, maybe people would get what your saying!

Master Fung: Reptile!

Dojo: Amphibian!

Dojo, if you don't get off the stage, I'll be forced to electrocute you! 

Dojo: Bye!

He races off the stage like a set of rims in a Puff Daddy concert.

(Clay: You do it to, huh?

_I don't do it all the time like you do!)_

Master Fung: What nerve. Gecko.

Yes, that's three out of five! OMG a new record! Master Fung, he wishes he were a Hell's Angel. 

Master Fung: I do not want to be associated with anything that has to do with Hell.

Hell's Angels (chanting): Join us, join us, join us…

Master Fung: I shall banish you demons with Holy Water!

He grabs this little flask with the words 'Holy Water' on from his coat pocket, where he keeps other flasks full of beer, wine, Hose Quevro, whiskey, stuff like that. (No wonder he doesn't make sense!) He throws it at the Hell's Angels and they all shrivel up and die.

Master Fung: I should be Van Helsing!

Yeah, (imitates Fung) I am the Van Helsing ninja! I will banish Chase Young! If I can! 

Fan girls: No, don't do that!

Master Fung: I won't!

Master Fung, he was named after fungus. 

Master Fung: I am? That's what it means?

He paces around the chair, thinking about his childhood.

Know you know Master Fung, the guy who calls Dojo 'gecko', a Hell's Angel wannabe, and is named after fungus. Gee, this guy is gullible!

There is the long, 2-hour chapter 5! Wow, that one was fun! Next up is Grand Master Dashi.


	6. Grand Master Dashi

Chapter 1 for disclaimer.

Hope you liked my long but funny chapter! Here is Chapter 6!

Chapter 6: Grand Master Dashi

As Master Fung leaves pondering why he is named after fungus, a blue vortex appears, Grand Master Dashi stepping out.

Master Dashi: Dojo, why did you mess up my good shirt? That costs a bundle!

Young Dojo: I'm sorry for the umpteenth time!

Master Dashi: Why aren't we going back to where I bought that shirt?

Young Dojo: I set the coordinates for Super Shirt Store, 506!

Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars… 

Master Dashi: Dojo, did you hear something?

Young Dojo: I did!

Hello, up here! 

Master Dashi: Is this the Super Shirt Store?

No. Master Dashi… 

Master Dashi: That's GRAND MASTER DASHI to you!

You better be glad I'm typing your name with capitals, almighty weirdo! Master Dashi, a third party had to hide the Shen Gong Wu. You have nothing to do with the Shen Gong Wu incident.

Master Dashi: What!

Omi: I can't believe it! False advisory!

Kimiko: False advertising.

Omi: That, too!

Master Dashi: I did too have to do with the Shen Gong Wu hidings! That took forever, I'll have you know!

Yeah, I bet. Master Dashi, he wears a bikini under his robes. (Thanks, **McMuffinDragon**!)

Young Dojo: So that's what you bought that day! Cross Dresser!

Master Dashi: It's not what you think!

Bad mental images! Help me! And I thought Kimiko was ugly!

Kimiko: Hey! Don't make me draw a picture of your tongue!

Kimiko, there is an Early Bird special at Dollar General. Go by hair dye there!

Master Dashi: Let's focus on me!

Young Dojo: Yeah, let's focus on Grand Master Dashi the Cross-dresser!

Master Dashi: Gecko!

Young Dojo: Trophy Wife!

Hey, I'm supposed to make you mad! Master Dashi, his room is full leprechauns.

Master Dashi: No, it isn't!

Your room is full of cross-dressing leprechauns.

Young Dojo is hardly breathing from laughing to hard.

Master Dashi: Shut up, Dojo, before I get the garden hoe!

Young Dojo: Which one, the gardener, or the gardening utensil!

Master Dashi: Dojo! Childrens are reading this fanfic!

Know you know GRAND Master Dashi, the cross dressing guy that has cross-dressing leprechauns in his room and is not responsible for hiding the Shen Gong Wu.

Wow, that was long! R&R, ya'll! Next up is Dojo.


	7. Dojo

Chapter one for disclaimer!

As you have noticed, I am doing the Wudai warriors first. Then it goes to the Haylins'! Here is the last of the Wudais', Dojo!

Chapter 7: Dojo

As GRAND Master Dashi and Young Dojo jump back into the blue portal, the older Dojo slithers onto the chair.

Dojo: I knew I sensed the Egg of Crap here!

He arrived at a big, brown, smelly egg the size of an Easter Bag. But, all of a sudden…

Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars 

Dojo: Oh, great, you're back!

…With a vengeance!!! Dojo, he's in love with Wuya! 

Dojo: WHAT! LIAR! I WOULD NEVER…

Wuya: Dojo, honey, guess what? I'm pregnant!

Dojo: WOW! CONGRADULATIONS!

If I had a single bit of humanity in me, I would awe in pleasure. 

At that moment, Wuya swipes the nasty egg and floats off.

Wuya: So long, sucka! WHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Dojo: Honey, don't go! NOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I'm glad THAT soap opera's gone! 

Dojo: Shut up!

Dojo, he hates Miazaki movies. 

Just then, Chihiro, Ubaba, Naussica, Haku, the big baby, that weird crow, Princess Mononoke, the Catbus, Totoro, the pigs, the robots from the castle, and No-face appear madly.

Chihiro: Get the stupid snake like thingy!

Dojo: I'm not a reptile, weirdo!

That definitely sparked the Weird War. After magic spells, pig charges, eatings, extendable fists, belly bouncing, slingshots, a cat car running over the poor thing, kicking, and dragon transformations, they left, leaving a badly wounded snake/dragon lying on the ground.

Dojo: Owie! That hurt!

How entertaining! 

Dojo: Don't you have something better to do?

_This is it, other than cleaning my room and washing the dishes._

Dojo: Yeah right!

_Dojo, don't look now, but there is a spider dangling over your head._

Scared stiff as a board, he looks up. A big spider the size of a dinner plate hangs from the thinnest web it could weave.

Dojo: GET IT AWAY FROM ME!!! AAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

Dojo runs to the nearest exit.

Ahh yes, the power of fake spiders! Now you know Dojo, the Miazaki hater that is scared of fake spiders and is in love with Wuya. 

Well look at that! A good chapter! After many pleads and fangirl annoyances, (I really appreciate it, though!) Jack Spicer is the next one on the list!


	8. Jack Spicer

Chapter 1 for disclaimer.

Time for the Heylin warriors! Here is the favored character, Jack Spicer!

Chapter 8: Jack Spicer

With no one in the stage, Jack Spicer appears, Jack-bots surrounding him.

Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars… 

Jack: AHH! Creepy voice! Jack-bots, anniadestrucgoboomify!

Jack-bots: JACK SPICER, EVIL BOY GENIUS, I CANNOT FIND THE VOICE'S DESTINATION.

Jack: Huh?

Jack-bots: I CAN'T FIND WHERE IT CAME FROM.

_It's the way I work, momma's boy._

Jack: Don't call me momma's boy!

Whatever, mama's boy. Jack Spicer… 

Jack: That's Evil Boy Genius…

_SHUT IT, COOKIE COOKER! Jack Spicer, his real name is Jacklynn Spicegirl. (_**Thanks, McMuffinDragon!)**

Jack: It is not!

Jack-bots: HA HA HA!

Jack: Shut it!

The Jack-bots open a compartment in it's mechanical torso, revealing a CD player with a Spice Girl's CD in it. The Jack-bot then pushes a button, and "Wannabe" pours out of its speakers. Jack stars singing of key and dancing in a funny way.

Jack: You tell me what you, what you really really want! I'll tell you what you want, what you really really want. I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really really tell gub a zib a zib ahh!

The Jack-bot stops the music while he is standing there, dumbfounded.

Hee hee! How funny! 

Jack: The song is kind of catchy!

_Snort_

Jack: Shut up, already!

Jack Spicer… 

Jack: Evil boy gen…

I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want, and that's for you to SHUT UP! 

Jack: whimper

_Jack Spicer, he stole red hair dye from Kimiko._

Jack: No I didn't!

Kimiko: Hey, you stole my red hair dye AND my Spice Girls CD!!

Jack: It's not what you think!

Kimiko shoots fire with the Star Hanabi and instead of hitting Jack, it hit the nearest Jack-bot.

Jack: That was a close one!

Kimiko: You look like a monster with my hair dye!

Jack: Is that why you look like one, too?

Ouch! He just pawned you, Kimiko! 

Kimiko: Don't rub it in!

She runs off.

Jack: I'm good!

Jack Spicer… 

Jack: For the last time, evil boy…

_SHUT IT, GEEKY FREAKY! Jack Spicer, he thinks Katnappe is a Catwoman poser._

Katnappe: What?!

Jack: I don't think that!

Katnappe: Super kittens, attack!

A bunch of cute kittens jump out. Then their eyes glow red, and they pounce on the stupid boy. He is ripped to pieces, or at least his clothes are.

Jack (dizzily): I think it's time for bed, Teddy!

Now you know, Jack Spicer… 

Jack: Evil…

Guards, release the super duper ninja squirrels that have wigs on! 

A bunch of guards open cages, revealing mad squirrels wearing ninja suits and have different wigs on. They start pouncing on him like was nuts. He is nuts.

Know you know Jack Spicer, the guy that stole Kimiko's hair dye, thinks Katnappe is a Catwoman poser, and real name is Jacklynn Spicegirl.

Ya'll look like ya'll like that one! Next up is, of course, Wuya!


	9. Wuya

Chapter one for disclaimer!

Sorry I took so long. I didn't want to do this chapter for a while. I wanted to take a little break. I have FINALLY gotten out of school! Xiaolin Summer!!! All righty, chapter 9 at your service.

Chapter 9: Wuya

After the ninja squirrels carted off a tied up Jack, Wuya floats in, without the Egg of Crap.

Wuya: Why me? Why do I always lose? I will get my revenge! OOO! Cookies!

A snack table mysteriously appears. Wuya sits down (even though she can't, she's a fricken ghost!)

_Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars._

Wuya ignores and eats every cookie in sight.

Umm… Miss Obesity, over here… 

Wuya: I oo iyi eaing hees ummy ooies!

Jack made those… 

Wuya immediately starts spitting out all the cookies.

Wuya: EEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWW! I'M GOING TO DIE AND I'M ALL READY A GHOST!

_You're gonna die? Well, Wuya, she hates Mr. T._

Wuya: Huh? What? No I don't!

Mr. T: I pity da fool that dares to hate me! I'll break your spine like a toothpick.

Mr. T starts to karate chop the ghost. However, nothing is happening.

Wuya: This is SO lame.

The author, sensing a downfall in the plot, decides to give Mr. T the Fenton-thermos (I stole that from _Danny Phantom _and they will never get it back) Wuya is then sucked up from a green plasma energy, and then is stuck in the thermos. Mr. T throws the thermos ate the wall.

Mr. T: I pity the poor ghostie fool.

It definitely was a big mistake. Wuya escaped through the top.

Wuya: I HATE YOU, OLD MAN!

_Told you! Wuya, you LOVE Raimundo._

Wuya: No I don't!

Meanwhile… 

The gang and Dojo search through the Spicer estate to steal Shen Gong Wu.

Raimundo: Oh this is great. Wuya has a shrine of me in her closet.

Back at the stage… 

Wuya: Well, maybe a little…

_Maybe a lot… Wuya, do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?_

Wuya: What? Why?

_We're in court._

Wuya: What for?

_Because Hot Pockets are nice._

Wuya: What does that got to do with anything?

_Wuya, she's a Hot Pocket._

Wuya suddenly turns into a small Wuya-shaped Hot Pocket.

_Now you know Wuya, the Hot Pocket that hates Mr. T and is in love with Raimundo._

Did that suck a little? Please R&R! I guess by popularity, Chase Young is next.


	10. Chase Young

WOW! THE TENTH CHAPTER ALREADY? GEEZ! I'm SOOOOOO exited! Well, 43 chapters is also another record for me. Thank you a whole lot for the people that have gave me ideas, reviewed, and, of course, how could you not, read! Here is chapter 10!

Chapter 10 !!Chase Young!!

After I eat Wuya, the yummy hot pocket witch, Chase Young appears, sipping a purple substance.

Chase: Oh, that's the good stuff, that's the good stuff.

Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars… 

Chase: Huh? Who's there?

_No one but you and de ablo._

Chase: Who's that?

_The devil._

Chase: OMG I'm your biggest fan!

_I bet you are. Chase Young, he once had a hairdo from the Bratz spa. _**(Thanks, Littlemissy999)**

Chase Young has a portable CD player playing the Bratz theme song over and over. (AN: You're probably wondering how I know about that. Well, believe it or not, I have cousins that have fallen in love with the fricken doll. Sometimes, I want to get the dolls, rip their heads off, hang them from the ceiling, and bury the body in the woods.)

Chase: What was that? I can't hear you.

_Snort HAHAHAHAHA!_

Chase: What? I don't understand.

_Chase Young, he sleeps with a teddy bear and sucks his thumb. _**(Thanks, DemonDaughter!)**

Chase: No I don't! Even if I did, how would you know?

_Omi took pictures of you and sent them to me._

Omi: Chomp that, you piece of doodoo!

Clay: I think you mean eat that, you piece of crap.

Omi: That makes no sense whatsoever.

Chase: Baldy, you want to settle this down here?

Omi: No thanks; it's quite comfy up here.

Chase: Is there leather seats?

Omi: Maybe.

Omi, no communicating with the tortureree! 

Omi: Sorry!

_Chase Young, he uses Magic 8 balls to see the right time to kidnap Omi._

Omi: No, he doesn't! Does he?

_Look for yourself._

Chase takes out a Magic 8 ball and shakes it.

Chase: Is it all right to kidnap Omi NOW?

The magic 8 ball reveals a 'Try Again Later'.

Chase: Man!

Omi, Clay, Raimundo, and Kimiko: Get him!

A big cartoonish fight cloud appears.

Know you know Chase Young, the guy whose hair was done by the Bratz spa, uses magic 8 balls to know when to kidnap Omi, and sleeps with a teddy bear while sucking his thumb.

Wow! Look at chapter 10! So beautiful! Well, the next chapter is Tubbimura!


	11. Tubbimura

I really do apologize that I haven't written a new chapter in so long. I have had so much to do these past few days and/or weeks. Well, to make up for it, here is chapter 11!

Chapter 11: Tubbimura

After the cartoonish fight cloud disappears, Tubbimura struggles through the doorway, and then pops through.

Tubbimura: I wish I could get through those doorways! I always have this kind of trouble!

Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars… 

Tubbimura: Who said that?

I did… 

Tubbimura: Who are you?

_Someone._

Tubbimura: Tell me who you are!

_If I told you that, I would have to kill you._

Tubbimura: Whimper.

_Tubbimura, he represents McDonalds._

Tubbimura: WHAT!

Ronald McDonald (the evil clown who we should all kill, just like we killed Barney) appears with a roaring chainsaw.

Ronald: McDonalds is too big for the both of us! And if I leave it'll still be too big!

Tubbimura: Gay clown! Attack!

They start fighting. Then a bunch of kindergarteners' on a field trip walk in.

One kid: OMG a fat guy is killing Ronald McDonald! KILL RONALD MCDONALD!

The kindergarteners start beating up Ronald, too.

Tubbimura: Yay, kids helping me beating up the gay clown!

The sound of laughing and munching popcorn could be heard of stage as the teachers stab Ronald with pencils and cart his dead body off stage and into boiling oil.

_Best show I've ever seen._

Tubbimura: Why don't you come down and fight?

_Because the writer wrote and said so, so there._

Tubbimura: Screw the writer!

And, with just that, HoldYourFire appeared, very very madlike!

HoldYourFire: Eat me, stupid gay sumo ninja of Hell!

And just like that, they started fighting, HoldYourFire obviously winning because he is the writer and has powers beyond the imagination, stove, and Hot Pocket!!

Tubbimura: Oh, that guy is scarier that ever!

_Never mess with the writer! Tubbimura, his mascot is Catnappe._

Tubbimura: No it isn't!

Catnappe: Meow! I never knew!

Catnappe starts chasing Tubbimura happily.

Tubbimura: Get away from me! I'll have a heart attack!

Catnappe: Say you love me and I'll stop!

Tubbimura: All right! I love you!

_Snort._

Tubbimura: Shut up!

Fine, mister Catnappe! 

Tubbimura: I need to sit down!

He sits down in one of them chairs that you find in the real Know your Stars shows and breaks it.

Tubbimura: Oops.

_Fatty._

Tubbimura: Shut up.

_Fine, Fatty._

Tubbimura growls.

_Tubbimura, he hates Kirby. _(Who doesn't?)

HoldYourFire and the mob walk on stage with swords.

HoldYourFire: Kill him!

After ball transformations, UFO shootings, knife boomerangs, swords, diamond rays, fiery and icy breaths, thorny sides, ice shields, lightning blasts, getting run over by a wheel and getting squished by a rock, getting hit by a hammer, back drops and throws, laser beams, tornadoes, bad singing, light throws, bomb explosions, being eaten and getting stars thrown at them, they leave a badly hurt Tubbimura.

_Now you know Tubbimura, the Kirby hater that's mascot is Catnappe and is the representative of McDonalds. Ouch._

Hope you liked it! Next up is Catnappe.


	12. Katnappe

Hello, fans. How are those tacos I personally sent? Good? What! BAD! Humph! Anyway, I have gotten a notice clearly stating that you spell Katnappe with a K and not a C. So, please excuse the last chapter's spelling of 'Katnappe' and my very professional executive typing. Donald Trump fired me a few days ago. Who knew he owned Taco Bell. Hee hee.

Chapter 12: Katnappe

As Tubbimura was safely scraped off the pavement of the stage by a blurred yours truly, Katnappe enters with her kitties. (KITTIES! I LOVE KITTIES!)

Katnappe: Don't worry my precious wittle baby-waybies! Mama's got some lovely milk for you!

Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars… 

Katnappe: Who's there? Jack, that better not be you or you'll be in a catfight! Meow!

_OMG I hope that isn't my car honking! Oh, it's just you._

Katnappe: You beggin' for something, I know you are!

_Katnappe, she's in love with Halle Barry._

Halle Barry: Wow, you are in love with my work.

Katnappe: OH YES DEFINETLY!!

_How lame._

Katnappe: It is not lame! Catwoman is an awesome movie!

_Poser._

Jack Spicer: I told you I didn't call you a poser!

Katnappe: Shut it, all mighty evil failure.

Jack: You ARE a poser!

Katnappe: I was right! You do think I'm a poser!

They start fighting. Katnappe wins because Hot Pockets voted so. You don't get a vote, so there. After a while, Jack leaves.

_Katnappe, she picks her nose._

Katnappe turns away from the camera and puts a finger on her face. She then puts something under the stool and turns around.

Katnappe: You said something?

Dojo: That's the most disgusting thing I ever seen!

Tubbimura: She does that to her cats, too.

Kimiko: Way too much info.

Omi does the same thing as Katnappe did.

Raimundo: You're doing it, too?

Omi: Master Fung does it too.

Master Fung: Clay inspired me!

Clay: That this was so annoying! I was more frustrated than my pappy trying to watch porno quietly in the bathroom!

Jack: I'm surrounded by idiots whose dads watch porno in the bathroom!

Wuya: Those are very interesting videos.

Every does an animea fall, even the evil voice.

Chase: You bunch are SO immature. I'm going to watch Dora the Explorer with my teddy bear while sucking my thumb.

_This sucks smelly butt. Katnappe, she wears her mother's army boots._

Katnappe: YEAH! SHE HAS BIG FEET! She's like going to the army limping with her big boots!

Ashley's mother: Hey, these boots were made for walking, and one of these days these boots are going to walk all over you!!

Katnappe: YOU ARE THE LAMEST PERSON ON THE PLANET! AND MY NAME IS KATNAPPE, IDIOT!

Now you know Katnappe, the Halle Barry lover that wears her mother's army boots and picks her nose.

Wow! So much fun. Well, here is chapter 12. Next up, and for this person's unluckyness, here comes a Jack-bot. Smiles, everyone, smiles!!


	13. A Jack Bot

I am now going to go down in history. I will be the FIRST AND ONLY PERSON to put a Jack-Bot in my story to be evilly taunted. Evilly. Hope you're not superstitious, because here is chapter 13!

Chapter 13 A Jack-Bot

As Katnappe picks her nose and puts a booger on her mother's army boots, a Jack-Bot zooms in.

Jack-bot: JACK SPICER, EVIL BOY GENIUS, WHERE IS YOUR LOCATION? WE REQUIER YOU ACCISTANCE!

_Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars…_

Jack-bot: OH NO, THE EVIL VOICE OF TORCHURE! JACK, I REALLY NEED SOME ACCISTANCE!!!

_Not in this mechanical life of yours, nutty bolt. Jack-bot, he owns a poodle._

Jack-bot: YEAH, I DON'T KNOW WHY JACK BOUGHT ME ONE OF THOSE. WEIRD. SOMETIMES I THINK HE GOES CRAZY OVER ANYTHING.

_Please, tell me more about him. I need to make an embarrassing collage of him._

Jack-bot: HE GOES CRAZY IF YOU EAT THE LAST PUDDING CUP. HE WATCHES BLUES CLUES WHEN HE LOSES A SHOWDOWN. HIS MOTHER LOOKES LIKE A HORSES' ASS IN A GLUE FACTORY.

_Funny. Back to my story, though. Jack-bot, he wants to kidnap Clay for his good looks._

Clay looks a little annoyed. He has that animae headache thing.

Jack-bot: HEY, DON'T LOOK AT ME! IF JACK PROGRAMS ME TO DO IT, I HAVE TO DO IT. THE WRITER'S ALSO IN THIS.

Clay now has the animae headache and the animae sweat thing.

_Clay, if I were you, I would corner Jack in the bathroom. The seed of evil will be destroyed if the creator is cornered in the bathroom and tied up and thrown at the mirror._

Clay: Will do.

_You are a bigmouth, you know that?_

Jack-bot: HEY, LIKE I SAID, IF JACK SPICER ORTHE WRITER PROGRAMS ME TO DO IT, I DO IT. IT'S THE WORK OF GOD.

_That is the most stupidest thing I have ever heared of. Jack-bot, he is married to Bill Gates._

Jack-bot: IS THAT WHAT THIS RING IS FOR? I THOUGHT IT WAS FOR MY BEAUTIFUL DECORATION. HUMPH. WEIRD. OH WELL.

_Now you know a Jack-bot, the robot that wants to kidnap Clay for his good looks, has a poodle, and is married to Bill Gates._

Wow, I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOO famous!! Well, anyway, here is chapter 13. Next up is Vlad.


	14. Vlad

Righto, then. How is your day today? Boring? Is that why you're here? Good, time to read! Chapter 14 is here!!! Now, for those who don't know who Vlad is, he appeared on "The Crystal Glasses," where he joined the temple while secretly working for the Haylins. Ya'll have not seen him since. And one more thing. I need more suggestions for my story! I can't waste my brain making this story without the readers helping too!! Now, this will be the nastiest chapter in the story, so please read this chapter on an empty stomach! Oh, and I announce that I have made a new story, Know your Cul-De-Sac Stars, which is Know your stars with Ed, Edd, and Eddy.

Chapter 14 Vlad

As the Jack-bot helps Jack after Clay ties him up and throws him at the mirror, Vlad walks in, sitting on the stool and breaking it.

Vlad: Jeez, I need to lose some weight. Maybe Grandma's Fishy Earwax Baste will help!!

_Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your… PEE YEW!! WHAT IS THAT SMELL?!_

Vlad: It's my Grandma's Fishy Earwax Baste! Good for losing weight!

_Good for suicide! That stuff will knock a buzzard off a gut wagon!_

Vlad starts swallowing the orange smelly goop with the fish tail sticking out.

_I need medical transportation. OK, I feel better. Whew. Vlad, he loves to eat his dead ancestors innards._

Vlad: Best stuff to eat, too. Especially with my Great-Granddad's Raw Chicken Worcestershire Pudding!

He takes out a bowl of what looks like a brown sauce with a chicken leg sticking out. He starts to eat it.

_Dear Nintendo, help this man. He thinks that Salmonella is not a fate worse that a Hot Pocket exploding in a microwave, which is not a fate worse than a Nintendo bursting into flames, which is a fate worse than death._

Vlad: Mmm Mmm! That's the best stuff I have ever tasted!

_Where's that clothe pin and paper bag? Whew! Vlad, he wants Jack to be his wife!_

Jack: Sorry to burst your nasty bubble, dude, but I'm straight!

Vlad: Oh, weinershnitzel! Now to find a new man!

Jack has the anime sweat and the anime fall.

_Nice excuse, Jack. Is that why you hate Wuya?_

Jack: I'm not gay!

Fan Girls: We're glad! WE LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!

They go and grab Jack and run out of the stage.

Vlad: Hey! What about me?!

_Vlad, they don't want you!_

Vlad: My sister/cousin once told me that some Blue Raspberry Robutessin Pie would always help!

He takes out a pie with black liquid oozing out of the top. He starts pigging out.

_Eew! Why isn't he dead from the Salmonella pudding from earlier?! Vlad, he hasn't taken a shower in years!_

Vlad: I know! It's to ward off evil spirits!

A fly starts to buzz near him. It dies. A rocket explodes near the stage, but the stage doesn't burn because Hot Pockets are nice. Australia capsizes into the Pacific Ocean. Rosie O' Donnell is voted for president.

Vlad: Did I do all that?

_Yeah!! Are evil spirits people?_

Vlad: No!

And with that, the spirits of the rocket driver and the people from Australia walked in.

Rocket driver: Get him!

The spirits start charging, but then the smell of the Robutessin pie and the smell of Vlad ward them off into heaven.

_WOW! Now you know Vlad, the person who hasn't taken a shower in years, eats the innards of his ancestors, and wants Jack to be his wife._

Hope you like this chapter! Oh, and please realize that if this offends any Rocket drivers, Australians, Russians, and Rosie O' Donnell lovers, I do apologize. This chapter does not reflect my views, just my imagination. Next is the Chameleonbot.


	15. Chameleon Bot

Hi guys! I've been on a hiatus for a while and I haven't updated my story. As you may now from my stories, I absolutely love the band RUSH!! I may put them into a few chapters. So, here's a fresh start to a new chapter!

Chapter 14: Chameleon-Bot

As the ghosts pick up Vlad and toss him into a soapy river, the Chameleon-Bot walks in.

Chameleon-Bot: Where's Jack? I want to assume control.

_Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars…_

Chameleon-Bot: I don't want to. I want to assume control over Jack Spicer.

_I want to ruin your mechanical circuitry. Chameleon-Bot, he hates Sonic the Hedgehog._

Bravado: Assume control over this, you bathead!

Bravado, Sonic, Shadow, Amy Rose, Big and Froggy, Cream and Cheese, Dr. Robotnic, Dr. Eggman, Tails, the SEGA people, Fastfeet (from SEGA Sonic TV on Winamp), Knuckles… pant …Rouge, the robot, the Chaotix Detective Agency, and Chris start to attack the Chameleon-Bot, except for Espio, who sits this one out on account of he is a chameleon himself. Afterward, they all leave, leaving a metal silver box with a bow (Merry Christmas!). It opens itself, and a battered machine gasps for mechanical air. (A/N I should, too. I can type that much!!)

Chameleon-Bot: Phew! Well then…

The guys start to attack him again, again except for Espio, on account of he is a chameleon himself. They walk away, leaving a Nintendo Wii with a game of Sonic Wildfire and Sonic the Hedgehog. (Each Sold Separately) Sega!!

Chameleon-Bot: Good gravy!

_Funny. Chameleon-Bot, he hates Rush._

Bravado: I'll kill you!

Bravado, Neil Peart, Alex Lifeson, Geddy Lee, and the Sonic gang (except for Espio) beat him up, leaving a copy of Rush in Rio and a SEGA Dreamcast (Sold together for an extra half a cent)

Chameleon-Bot: Not again.

The gang beat him up once more, this time including Espio, because he has nothing else to do except eat a Four Cheese Hot Pocket, which tastes disgusting, sadly. (A/N It really does. WHY MUST YOU BETRAY ME, HOT POCKET!)

Chameleon-Bot: Please…Stop…Now!!!

_Uhh… Never… Chameleon-Bot, do you have an alibi?_

Chameleon-Bot: Why would I need one?

_So you don't have one?_

Chameleon-Bot: No.

_So, you don't have an alibi because YOU UGLY!_

Chameleon-Bot: I am not!

_Now you know Chameleon-Bot, the robot who hates Sonic the Hedgehog, Rush, and has no alibi because he's UGLY!_

There it is! Now, a new note: next chapter will be the ultimately evil Hannibal Roy Bean. Oooh hoo hoo!


	16. Hannibal Roy Bean

So… Tai Shan was a bust. Just to let you know jerks, I put a lot of effort in that story! So whoever hated that story can eat me.

But, on a lighter, dryer note, I have a new chapter!! It's time for Hannibal Roy Bean to spill his guts!! (Not literally)

Chapter 16: Hannibal Roy Bean

As the Chameleon-Bot tried to 'assume control' over the SEGA mob beating him up, a small bean hops onto the chair (of doom!!!) of pink bunnies.

Bean: Where in the Ying-Yang world is Ying-Ying?

_Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars…_

Bean: Why? I own them!!

_Because you are a bean._

Bean: Racist!

_A southern bean. Hannibal Roy Bean, his real name is Huggable Roll with Beanie-Weenie!_

Bean: No it isn't!

_And Ying-Ting is really Stuffed Duck with a Mango Sauce._

Bean: She isn't either! And it's Ying-Ying!!

Kimiko: Whatever, fruit!

Bean: No, that's a common misconception. I am an evil **VEGETABLE!!!**

Omi: HAHAHA! You called him a fruit! He's probably a pineapple like the guy from Yakity Yak!

Chase: That show got canceled. I can hardly see why.

Clay: Because you watch it.

Raimundo: Burn!!! Hahaha!

Chase grumbles about a guilt trip and a deep hole in a fish tank.

Wuya: Who wants Hot Pockets?

Bravado rushes by her and the plate with Hot Pockets on it disappeared.

Wuya: OH NOES! WHY?!?!?!?!?!?

Dojo: Idiot.

Chameleon-Bot: I have finally assumed control.

He had a bag with Jack Spicer in it.

Jack: Help me.

Just then the Sonic cast swiftly sucker-punched the machine, letting Jack get free. They left a Jack Spicer plushy.

Jack: That's me!

Oh. Sorry, I'm delusional from all the Hot Pockets. Continuing…

_OK, then… Huggable Roll with Beanie-Weenie, he shot a man just for a PS3._

Man that was shot: NO WAY, DUDE! STILL…

The man takes a shotgun and shoots the bean 11 times!

Man that was shot: WOW! I'M JUST LIKE DICK CHAINY!

_Is that spelled correctly? Oh well. Hannibal R… Huggable Roll with Beanie-Weenie, he shot the Creator of CASE CLOSED!!!! (A/N that was a cartoon that came on at 5:30 in the morning on Adult Swim before they took it off)_

Jimmy Kudo, the Junior Detective League, Richard and Rachel Moore, the criminals, the men in black, and all the others I cannot name from the Hot Pocket dilusiation attacked the bean.

_Now you know Huggable Roll with Beanie-Weenie, the Southern bean that shot the Creator of Case Closed and a man just for a PS3._

Next chapter is the guests on the show. First off is Jermaine Hawkins.


	17. Jermaine Hawkins

Tomorrow, I have my Christmas Break. SWEET!!!! I have an awesome Christmas List. I hop to get a Nintendo Wii and DS. But, who wants to hear about the AUTHOR? Here's Jermaine Hawkins!

* * *

Chapter 17: Jermaine Hawkins

As Hannibal Roy Bean is shot by the Case Closed people, the PS3 guy, and the Sonic Team, Jermaine sits on a stool (of hatred!!!) of Smiley faces!

Jermaine: Where's Chase Young, yo?! I WAT REVENGE, DAWG!

_Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars…_

Jermaine: What? You mean basketball stars?

_No. Jermaine Hawkins, he likes Jack Spicer A LOT._

Jermaine: No, I ain't, dawg! I ain't no queer!

Jack: Neither am I, but Chase has been eyeing me lately.

Chase stares at him, smirking.

Fan-girls: NNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

They head butt both Chase and Jack into a locker room. VIEWER DISCRESION IS ADVISED!

_Warning: Tag Body Spray reminds you if you are a dragon-cursed human and a weird, selfish, evil, and self-absorbed genius boy, we are not responsible for the hot babes that tackle you into a locker room._

Omi: How the heck did you remember that commercial?

_How do you even know what a commercial is, you Amish baldy?_

Omi: For one, Kimiko bought a TV with TimVint…

Kimiko: That's TiVo, Omi. If you can't remember what a TiVo is, don't talk about it!!!!

Omi: Nagging witch. Anyway…

Kimiko: WHAT?????

Omi: Kimiko, sush!

Kimiko and Omi start to fight, leading themselves to the locker room. VIEWER DESCRETION IS ADVISED!!! (Déjà vu, huh?)

_WARNING: Tag Body spray reminds you that if you are a dragon-cursed human and a weird, selfish, evil, and self-absorbed genius boy, we are not responsible for the hot babes that tackle you into a locker room, or the fighting of a monk and a high hair-dye addicted freak._

Jermaine: Ok… I'm a little wacked about the locker room and the constant Tag body spray advertisements, dawg.

_Oh, and that's just the beginning. Jermaine Hawkins, his basketball has a handprint and a smiley face on it._

Just then Tom Hanks walks onto the stage with Steven Spielberg and start to slap him with a bunch of big cameras.

Tom and Steven: HOW DARE YOU STEAL SPALDWICK!!!

Jermaine: The dude up there's lying to you, dawg!!!

They keep hitting him.

_Righto. Jermaine Hawkins, there is cookies in the locker room._

Jermaine and Wuya: OMG COOKIES!!!!!!

They run into the locker room. VIEWER DESCRETION IS ADVISED!!

_WARNING: The makers of Tag Body Spray remind you that if you are a dragon-cursed human and a weird, selfish, evil, and self-absorbed genius boy, we are not responsible for the hot babes that tackle you into a locker room, or the fighting of a monk and a high hair-dye addicted freak, plus a ghost and a basketball lover consuming cookies._

_Righto, then. Now you know Jermaine Hawkins, the lil' dude that likes Jack Spicer A LOT, kidnapped Spaldwick, and is currently eating cookies with Wuya in the locker room where Chase and Jack… well, you shouldn't know about that… and where a bald monk and a freak are fighting.

* * *

_

WHOOO!!!! Next Chapter: Sonic! Just kiddin'! It's… oh no. I'VE RUN OUT OF PEOPLE!!! Wait… hold on… there's Clay's sister, Jesse!!!! After that, the story comes to a close!!!!


	18. Jesse Bailey

Thanks to someone, they told me there were more characters. Crapidy. So, here are future chapters:

Jesse Bailey, Mala Mala Jong, Dyris (please tell me who she is), Chase's Jungle Cat, Master Monk Guan, and lastly, the spiders. If someone could tell me who Megan and Klofang is, please let me know.

Now it's time for Jesse Bailey!

* * *

Chapter 18: Jesse Bailey

While everyone ran out of the locker room from the huge fog of Tag Body Spray, Jesse sits down in the chair (of electricity!!!) of happy teddy bears.

Jesse: Where's that old cowpoke of a brother of mine?!

_Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars…_

Jesse: What?

_Oh, wait, you can't know the stars considering Jesse Bailey, you're a stupid fat man._

Jesse: I'm a chick, son.

_Who would want to be YOUR son, he-she?_

The Xiaolins laugh at her embarrassment.

Jesse: I'll kill you Clay!!!

She tries to get out of the chair, but her butt is stuck in it. The Xiaolins laugh even more.

Jack: What the heck happened to her?

They look at Jack, who's being carried by Chase.

Jack: I'm just as puzzled as you are. Kick him in the shin, or something like that!

They kick Chase in the shin. He yelps in pain, but is still carrying Jack.

Jack: groan This is so gay and annoying.

Kimiko: I know! I'll draw his tongue!

She runs out of the room.

_Lord help me._

Omi: You believe in a lord?

_No, I believe in a Hot Pocket. **WHAT DO YOU THINK, YOU IDIOT!!!!**_

Omi: A Hot Pocket is a lord?

_GAAAAHHHH. Someone's going to kill him, and it may just be me._

Jesse: Hey, why do they get to be the center of attention?! They always get the attention!

_Clay, laugh at her!_

He laughs at her.

Jesse: That's not what I meant!

_Jesse Bailey, she stole Kimiko's dress because she's a sick freak._

Kimiko: I'm a little busy; I'm drawing Chase's tongue. Could you repeat that?

Fine. Jesse Bailey, he… 

Jesse: Once again, I'm a chick.

_Fine, Jesse Bailey, she stole Kimiko's dress because Jesse is a sick freak._

Kimiko: Thank you. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

She screams in blind fury and hits her with a flaming chair.

Jesse: OOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW!

She runs around, trying to do a stop-drop-and-roll, but the chair is still stuck on her dairy-air.

Jesse: HOLY CRAP!!!

Just then, the kindergarteners on a field trip runs and splash water on him.

Jesse: HER!!!!

What the heck ever.

Jesse: Thank you, kiddies!!

One kid: OMG RONALD MCDONALD HAS COME BACK TO LIFE!!! KILL HIM!!

The kids grab a recliner and throw it at him.

Jesse: I'M A GIRL!!!!!!!!

So? I'm the effin writer!!

Clay: The writer's a curser!!

eye roll Whatever.

_Quit talking to the writer, you dopes! Jesse Bailey, he-she's in love with Dr. Vivian Crowler from Yu-Gi-Oh GX._

Just then, she runs as fast as her knees can carry her.

_Now you know Jesse Bailey, the stupid hat he-she that stole Kimiko's dresses because he-she is a sick freak, and loves Dr. Vivian Crowler._

* * *

YEAH!!!! Next Chapter: Mala Mala Jong!!! 


	19. Mala Mala Jong

Thank you, Kiliko! I remembered who Klofange and Dyris are! But, for now, time for Mala Mala Jong.

Chapter 19: Mala Mala Jong

* * *

As Jesse steals Kimiko's dress and goes out on a date with Dr. Crowler, Mala Mala Jong walks in, carrying Wuya on his shoulders, Chase in one hand, and Jack by the other hand.

Jong: RRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

Jack plays with the Emperor Scorpion.

Jack: Mala Mala Jong, if Wuya or Chase tries to lay a hand on me, shoot 'em both with the Eye of Dashi and/or the Thorn of Thunderbolt.

Wuya/chase: TRAITOR!!!!!!

Mala Mala Jong shoots both of them 2 lightning bolts.

Jack: Ha ha!

_Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars…_

Jack/Wuya/Chase: HOLD CRAP!

Jong: WWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!

_I need a translator._

Omi walks in with the Mind Reading Conch and the Reversing Mirror for protection.

Omi: Here I am.

_Good. Mala Mala Jong, he loves cooking scrambled eggs for Jack!!_

Jack: No he doesn't.

Jong: WWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRHHHHHHHHHHFFFFF!!!

Omi: He said…

He starts to pantomime him like a caveman.

Omi…I don't cook eggs for Jack.

Jong: WHAAAAAARRRRRHHHHHHHFF!!

Omi: He said that Jack doesn't even like eggs.

Everyone in the room moans and shakes their head.

_Well, then…_

Wuya: I was about to say… I'll kill you Jack!

Jong shoots both of them again.

Jack: Remember…

Chase: Wuya, shut up!

_Married problems?_

Wuya: We are not married!

Chase: We are not married!

Jack: He's married to one of his cats!

Everyone looks at Chase with darkness in their eyes, while the fan girls crush his bones.

Jack: Ha ha!

Jong shoots Wuya and Chase again. Jack fell off of Jong's hand, trying to breathe.

Wuya: What was that for!

Jong: WAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGFFFFFFFTDDDDDDDDDD!!

Omi: He said that he thought they were rabbits.

Jack is now unconscious.

_Laughing too hard will do that!_

Jack wakes up.

Jack: That was funny! Do it again!

_Mala Mala Jong, he's in love with Omi._

Jong: WWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGDDDDDDD.

Omi looked puzzled and wanted to cry.

Omi: MASTER FUNG!!!

He runs.

_What he say?_

Raimundo: Jong said that Omi was a bigheaded idiot who never knows when to shut his big mouth.

Everyone: HOW DID HE KNOW THAT?

Raimundo: Sillies, because I really know him!

_OMG you mean like that Amazing Allison commercial._

Raimundo: No, actually I was making fun of you all. I took a guess, idiots. Pff.

He walks. After that, Mala Mala Jong shoots Wuya and Chase.

Jong: WHWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHAAAAA!!!

Jack: Stand up straight!

Wuya and Chase faint.

Jack: Idiots.

_Where's my new translator?_

Jack: Hi, I have the Ruby of Ramses.

_Mindlink._

Jack activates the ruby, and Jack's eyes glow yellow.

_Mala Mala Jong, he is really M.C. Hammer._

Jack/Jong: Crapsody! Foiled again!

They run.

_Now you know Mala Mala Jong, who makes eggs for Jack, is in love with Omi, and is really M.C. Hammer.

* * *

_

YAY!!! Next Chapter: Chase's Jungle Cat! After that: Cyclops.


	20. Chase's Jungle Cat

HAPPY 20th!!!! I mean chapter, you dumbkofh! Now, Hot Pockets for everyone! No, wait, I need those back for my computer's motherboard!!!!

Beauty: WWWWWHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAATTTTT!!!!

Shush, Beauty! It's time for some randomness!!!

Chapter 20: Carry the five… I mean Chase's Jungle Cat!!!

* * *

As M.C. Hammer tried to 'touch that' (not in that way, pervs!) while walking, the Sonic Team holds up signs saying that Sonic should be on every channel. After a while a big cat walks… or is it struts… anyhow, he skips his way into the room. He would sit on a chair, but he is scared of them considering how many times Chase did his…uh…thing.

(FLASHBACK)

Chase: DO DO DO DO DO DORA!!! DO DO DO DO DO DORA! DORA, DORA, DORA THE EXPLORER!

He hides behind one of his jungle cats watching CNN's The O'Riely Factor.

Chase: DDDDDDDDDDDDDOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAA!!!

The cat roars at the top of its lungs and pounced on top of a high speaker. Chase grabs a microphone and plugs it into the speaker.

Chase: DDDDDDDDDDDDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

The cat hides in a torture (which was a game room) chamber and begs for Armageddon to come and sweep the Christians out of the Earth.

(END FLASHBACK)

_Know your Dora's… I mean Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars…_

Rai: I don't get this theme of 'Dora the Explorer'! I say we replace that Spanish meatloaf that gives mu culture a bad name and create…

He unveils a sign of Clay, Omi, Kimiko, himself, Jack, Wuya, Chase, and Hannibal Roy Bean.

Rai:…Xiaolin Showdown!!!

Just then a bomb with 'You Suck' written on it exploded with Raimundo in the way.

_God, why did you invent traveling salesmen? Chase's Jungle Cat… Oh great, another non-talker. Where's the translator?_

Omi: Here I am!

_Good. Heh heh… Um… Chase's Jungle Cat… he exploded the Twin Towers._

That was when Jermaine Hawkins got a Machine Gun and a rocket launcher and shot the cat with it.

Chase: How does it feel?!?!?!!

Omi: He said he hates your guts for being… what is a (Beep)?

Just then, an anvil fell on Omi that said 'Watch your mouth!'

Kimiko: My turn!

She grabs the Mind Reader Conch.

_This is so annoying. Chase's Jungle Cat… he wants to eat Shadow's face!_

Just then, a red spear pokes through the cat's carcass.

Shadow: GOTCHA!

OMG.

Just then, the Sonic team started to beat up the cat. They leave, leaving a Shadow plushie. (But it's mine.)

Great.

Cat: MEOWETH!

Katnappe: He said that he loves the Sonic team and wants their autograph.

Kimiko: That's my job, you which!

They have a big fight.

Clay: Catfight!

A big portrait falls on top of him that says 'Never intervene in a catfight.'

_Well… Chase's Jungle Cat…he is scared of Chase singing Dora the Explorer._

Chase skips around the cat holding Jack.

Chase: DODODODODO DORA! DODODO EXPLORA DORA!

He hold his breath while Jack closes his ears.

Chase: DDDDDDDDOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAA!!!!

The cat runs away, just as the Sonic Team and Carry the Five chases him.

Kimiko: Who's Carry the Five?

Just then, a rock fell on top of her, with a message that says 'Mind your own business!'

_Now you know Chase's Jungle Cat, who is scared of Chase singing Dora the Explorer, which I do, too, wants to eat Shadow's face, and exploded the Twin Towers._

_

* * *

_Smile! Next chapter: Dyris! After that: Klofange! 


End file.
